Monday, August 23, 2010

fantasy football

Now, don't get me wrong, I take the selection of my fantasy football team pretty seriously. As a past fantasy football champion (yes, I'm bragging), I have a lot of pride on the line. And, despite my inability to secure a running back that amounts to anything consistent or to ever be in a position to draft Peyton Manning, I like to think that I know what it takes to draft a winning team. However, as I gear up for draft day (8pm CST this Sunday for my all girls league), I've decided to put together the ultimate fantasy football team. For this team, players are judged on their overall appearance just as much, if not more so, as they're judged on their athletic ability. And, come to think of it, my fantasy football team name (2 Addai 4) seems to be the best way to sum up this team. Because with their good looks and athletic prowess, these boys are certainly to die for.

Adrian Peterson - Running Back - Other than Chris Johnson, AP rightfully finds himself on the top of most fantasy draft picks. Plus, have you seen him run in slow motion!?. Talk about muscle definition. Good looking and able to single-handedly crush most NFL defenses? That, my friends, is a true fantasy pick.

Reggie Bush
- Running Back - Anyone who has the ability to distract some attention from a teammate as good looking as Matt Leinart deserves to make it on this team. Since USC, Bush has gone on to win a Super Bowl ring and Leinart has a handful of less-than-sober-looking pictures of himself in a Jersey Shore-inspired hot tub scene floating around the internet. Clearly, Reggie did something right. Plus, the boy's got a killer smile and, when completely healthy, can juke a tackle like nobody's business. He may be a risky actual fantasy team draft pick, but for this team, he's a shoe-in.

Miles Austin - Wide Receiver - Gosh, two Kardashian boyfriends on one team! I didn't intend that, but Kim sure knows how to snag a good looking football player. I'll give the girl that. He racks up yards and has a smile that could make most girls swoon. Basically, he's smokin' hot on and off the field.

Wes Welker - Wide Receiver - He's on the shorter side and he spent a significant amount of time injured last season. But he's one of the most consistent receivers in the league. A go-to guy in the Patriots offense. And you can't argue with blue-green eyes like his when it comes to this fantasy team.

Hank Baskett -
Wide Receiver (honorable mention) - I'll admit it, I'm a big fan of Kendra. So, after watching a couple seasons of the show, I feel like I actually know Hank. He's charming and genuine and little Hank is adorable. (Which has to, at least in part, be attributed to Hank's great genes.) But I cannot and will not actually draft Hank for this team after the great onside kick debate of Super Bowl XLIV.Yes, it's just one play. And one single play does not make or break a game. But the Colts were never the same after that play. At that moment, they were defeated. And I blame Hank. But, gosh, little Hank has got to be the cutest football baby I've ever seen. For that, Hank gets a mention.

Tom Brady - Quarterback - As if there was any question. He's got 3 Super Bowl rings, 2 Super Bowl MVPS and the greatest chin dimple I've ever seen. I'll just let this picture do the talking. . .

Jason Witten - Tight End - Hands down my favorite player in the league. (Okay, that's not entirely true. But he's a close 3rd to Peyton Manning and Bob Sanders.) Witten has, in my mind, the absolute ideal build. Tall. Strong. Not too juiced-up or too defined. And when he's not wearing a helmet, he can usually be found in a backwards baseball cap, to boot! Witten is by far the captain of my fantasy football team. (Sigh!)

Adam Vinatieri - Kicker - Vinatieri looks like he belongs in a business suit instead of a uniform, but when the game's on the line he's Mr. Clutch. It doesn't get much better than that.

And a couple defensive guys to round out the roster . . .

Dwight Freeney -
Defensive End - One of the most stylish guys in the NFL and one of the most threatening to opposing QB's. Plus, he just happens to play for the best team in the league. Check, check and check.

Will Demps -
Safety - He's a little more GQ than NFL, but oh my, that skin. That smile. Those abs.

Okay, okay. This is arguably about the girliest you can get when it comes to football. So, sure, you can laugh now. But I'll be the one laughing when my real fantasy team (as if I'd reveal my strategy for that one) brings home the championship this season.

Let the fantasy games begin!

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